Datalakes and databogs

Inside your company sits a data-bog. It’s not a lake, it’s not a stream, it’s a shithole that no one talks about. People talk about the horrors of government bureaucracy, but that’s just a 250 year old company; your company is getting to be just as bad already! No one talks about it because it’s embarrassing. The people slogging through this data bog are often practically slaves. They have no specific title — you can’t find them without significant detective work — but they’re doing work that’s unergonomic, non automatable, irreplaceable, and absolutely crucial to the firm.

The reason this is happening is that the changes that have taken place over time to your database were not treated with precision and care; in fact the appropriate kind of care wasn’t even known! The history of those changes, all the refactorings that have occurred, were recorded in text files, programs, applications, and people’s heads, rather than in any sort of real system. The refactorings were never quite complete, in the sense that they could be simply forgotten; instead your company must constantly keep the remnants in the back of its head, so to speak, in totally unsystematic methods employed by low-level employees and contractors dispersed throughout the company.

If you find the poor slobs who keep your company living, the bacteria in your company’s gut biome, and you give them a name and honor them with the respect they deserve for staving off your company’s starvation, or perhaps dementia,you’ll figure out that much of what they do is what CQL offers. We’ve got a systematic approach to data model management. We systematize refactoring these systems, so that you can finally forget about it.